L’arma dei Carabinieri: una gazella agonizzante

carabinieri
gazzella dei carabinieri

Per dirla alla Manolo: per fortuna che stavano scopando. Vuol dire che nei Carabinieri non ci sono culattoni. In Italia ci indigniamo per una ciulata, per una scopata. Il massimo rigore richiesto niente meno che dal Capo dell’Arma per due che, poveri fessi, appunto dei carabinieri, non per nulla le barzellette si sprecano, hanno avuto un momento di debolezza. La carne è debole e il ca…o è in tiro. Mi lascia sorpreso, non per l’episodio che non voglio commentare ma per tutto questo rigore rigorosissimo, poi per una ciulata!

Minchia se sono fessi: all’odore della patata americana si sono sbracati, e vai! Certo, poi ci mettono pure del loro, dicendo che non se ne erano accorti, che erano ciuche marce. Il massimo rigore per lavare la vergogna di una scopata, deplorevole certamente…

Una punizione ci sta tutta, un atto di giustizia non lo si nega a nessuno, ma l’italia deve rendere pubblico al mondo intero una cosa che sarebbe dovuta rimanere circoscritta tra le mura di una caserma o al limite di un tribunale.

Popolo di bacchettoni, italia corrotta, incapace di gestirsi, grazie al mancato rigore di molte cose su cui dovevano vigilare proprio i carabinieri. Quando vai in caserma ti guardano con uno sguardo di quelli che hanno un punto interrogativo nel cervello, incollate le mani alla tastiera di una macchina da scrivere, usando solo l’indice per digitare quattro stupidate. Sono sempre più convinto dell’inutilità di questo ente, proprio il Capo dell’arma è stato indagato per rivelazione di segreti d’ufficio nella vicenda Consip, un affaruccio che meritava le dimissioni immediate.

E ci stupiamo per una scopata? Siamo così terrorizzati, a tal punto da auspicare che i nomi dei due militari vengano scritti sulle piastrelle dei cessi. E suvvia, per un po’ di sperma! L’italia è così piena di merda che per due macchie di altro colore… Una gazzella agonizzante.

Nickelback – Rockstar

I’m through with standin’ in lines to clubs I’ll never get in
It’s like the bottom of the ninth and I’m never gonna win
This life hasn’t turned out
Quite the way I want it to be
(Tell me what you want)

I want a brand new house on an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub
Big enough for ten plus me
(Yeah, so what you need?)

I need a a credit card that’s got no limit
And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet
(Been there, done that)

I want a new tour bus full of old guitars
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard
Somewhere between Cher
And James Dean is fine for me
(So how you gonna do it?)

I’m gonna trade this life
For fortune and fame
I’d even cut my hair
And change my name

‘Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ‘cause we just won’t eat

And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair

And well, hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar

I wanna be great like Elvis without the tassels
Hire eight body guards that love to beat up assholes
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free
(I’ll have the quesadilla, ha, ha)

I’m gonna dress my ass with the latest fashion
Get a front door key to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that loves
To blow my money for me
(So how you gonna do it?)

I’m gonna trade this life
For fortune and fame
I’d even cut my hair
And change my name

‘Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ‘cause we just won’t eat

And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair

And we’ll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of today’s who’s who
They’ll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody’s got a drug dealer on speed dial

Well, hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar

I’m gonna sing those songs that offend the censors
Gonna pop my pills from a Pez dispenser
Get washed-up singers writin’ all my songs
Lipsync ‘em every night so I don’t get ‘em wrong

Well, we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ‘cause we just won’t eat

And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair

And we’ll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of today’s who’s who
They’ll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody’s got a drug dealer on speed dial

Well, hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar


I’m through with standin’ in lines to clubs I’ll never get in
It’s like the bottom of the ninth and I’m never gonna win
This life hasn’t turned out
Quite the way I want it to be
(Tell me what you want)
I want a brand new house on an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub
Big enough for ten plus me
(Yeah, so what you need?)
I need a a credit card that’s got no limit
And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet
(Been there, done that)
I want a new tour bus full of old guitars
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard
Somewhere between Cher
And James Dean is fine for me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I’m gonna trade this life
For fortune and fame
I’d even cut my hair
And change my name
‘Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ‘cause we just won’t eat
And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair
And well, hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
I wanna be great like Elvis without the tassels
Hire eight body guards that love to beat up assholes
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free
(I’ll have the quesadilla, ha, ha)
I’m gonna dress my ass with the latest fashion
Get a front door key to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that loves
To blow my money for me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I’m gonna trade this life
For fortune and fame
I’d even cut my hair
And change my name
‘Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ‘cause we just won’t eat
And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair
And we’ll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of today’s who’s who
They’ll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody’s got a drug dealer on speed dial
Well, hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
I’m gonna sing those songs that offend the censors
Gonna pop my pills from a Pez dispenser
Get washed-up singers writin’ all my songs
Lipsync ‘em every night so I don’t get ‘em wrong
Well, we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, drivin’ fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ‘cause we just won’t eat
And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny with her bleach blond hair
And we’ll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of today’s who’s who
They’ll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody’s got a drug dealer on speed dial
Well, hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar

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